Having time to think, isn't always a good thing for me. The more I think, the more I doubt that what I'm doing is the right thing to do. I was never that good at waiting, but after all this time, almost 5 months to be exact, I think my patience has gotten better. Every time I see you, I pack all my fear and nervousness away in a box and seal it, so that I can talk to you. You probably don't notice, but I always get nervous when I'm near you. A lot of times, I see you around, such as at box hill on a friday, but I pretend I didn't see you, because I'm scared. I never know what to do, so I just walk away instead. What brings me down, is my jealousy, and how you don't seem to tell me anything that's going on in your life. If something is wrong, I'd like to be there for you, but you don't let me. Even today, msn doesn't want me to talk to you, as it keeps saying that 'the message couldn't be delivered' every time I try and talk to you. A lot of the time, I'm scared of talking to you, because I'm afraid of what I'll hear. I wonder how long I have to wait, until you acknowledge how much I'm willing to do for you. But the question I have to ask myself everyday is; is it worth all this pain? I don't think I'll know, at least not at the moment...
still waiting.
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