I doubted myself last night. I don't really know why, but I started asking myself, "what am I actually waiting for?" Then I also asked myself, "what if I wait, but nothing ever happens? What am I going to do with myself?" To be honest, I know why I'm waiting, but I don't know whether I'm waiting in vain or not. I think, I might have started to think those things, because of this feeling that I got, that you don't even want to talk anymore.
I didn't know what to do, so I talked to my friends about it, and they reminded me of what I had told them. I wasn't exactly in the best of moods last night, but I tried my best to seem natural. But then I also talked to God about it.
At church today, I was helping out with the parking, with Tim and Age. We had heaps of fun, and it really took my mind off things. But also, when we went into church for the service, God told me to just listen and not dwell on anything. Near the end of the service, Pastor Chee's wife said these words: "Before pre-service prayer, God told me to say this to everyone here, 'Don't lose hope'." It really hit me, and it just goes to show, that God is always looking out for us. I've been re-assured, because I trust in God.
still waiting.
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