tuning to 441

So today we got our year 12 hoodies! They're really warm and look quite good. When worn in conjunction with my jumper, even though it was freezing today, I was still warm. I'm glad we got them today haha.
Now, if you're wondering what I decided to put on my hoodie, then too bad, you won't get to find out. You'll have to come find me at school or be lucky enough to see me out wearing it! What I put on it isn't something generic, so I like to see people smile or laugh when they see it. (: Come find me if you're curious!


Also, during this year I've felt kinda... hmm, what's the word...un-interested? Probably not the best word to use as it doesn't really convey how I feel very well, but I think it's as close as I'm gonna get without consulting a thesaurus..
Anyway, I don't really know why, but I feel as though I've lost interest over the course of the year. I keep telling myself that I'm probably imagining it, but it's pretty clear that I'm not. It's been a year since the last time I confessed, but things just seem different this time round. It's not as though it's a bad thing, it's just not the same. I mean, we can still talk and stuff, but there is something missing that used to be there. It felt as though I was trying to keep the relationship "good" when it was just not meant to be.
During the year, I felt I was slowly drifting further and further away from this person, no matter what I tried to do. But, I think when it really hit me that it wouldn't work, was when I asked that person to come to my baptism. A significant event in my life, yet she didn't come. She didn't go out of her way to come and share that significant moment in my life. Even my friend Sarah, who had UCC later that night, found out details without me telling her and came to watch. I saw that person less and less, and sooner or later, it just didn't seem to matter anymore.
I think, through the little effort she showed, feelings have faded quite a bit, and with everyone telling me it's been too long and it's not worth it, a relationship with that person just doesn't seem possible.

I'm at a loss, as to what I'm supposed to do.

My friend has kept telling me to go for this other girl, because apparently she showed some interest in me, but I didn't share that same interest, and I didn't want to go for her.
But lately I've made friends with someone else, and it's been really nice talking to her. It's been a pretty long time since I've shown an interest in another person, and I think I might have forgotten the feeling. I can't say for sure whether or not that feeling is there, but it is nice to talk to that person.
Normally, I would feel guilty about talking too much to another girl, but that doesn't seem to be the case anymore. Now, I'm not too sure why that is, in fact, I'm not too sure why I would've felt guilty in the first place, since me and that other person weren't dating or anything. But when I talk to this new friend, everything just seems fine.
I enjoy talking to this person, and I don't know whats going to happen if I keep talking to her, but for now, I think it's good that I have someone to talk to. And it's also good because we share interests, so we seem to be able to talk really easily.

Wow that's a long post. I didn't realise I had typed so much...
Anyway, to finish off, I should probably explain the title of this post.

"tuning to 441" is a metaphor. 441 is the frequency of the musical note 'A' on guitar, and tuning to it means I'm tuning to a specific frequency. I said that I made a new friend and we hit it off pretty well, and so tuning to that frequency is a metaphor for meeting someone that I can be 'in sync' with. And yes, it does sound pretty corny, but I thought that it would be a nice title for this post. (:

Until next time I guess.